River Run

River run…..

The ambers murmur words unknown but yet comforting as my gaze caresses the tranquil waters of the lake. little did I know that, a few months back, all that was familiar was cast out, torn, raped and battered by those who do not See, while I was still lying on the cold ground, my heart pierced by a thorn which will never heal …’you do not stop grieving, you just get used to the pain’ she said, and this pain has become my best companion, my most faithful ally.

The waters of the lake look tranquil but under the deceivingly serene mirror, flows the dark watery rage, eager to rupture the banks and drown my spirit and strangle my soul. The same dam which threaten to break at each momentous encounter or whiffs of what used to be …

A soul of gold erupted this dam in the early hours of this morn and the salted waters of my longing have erupted and drenched my face, my spirit still in awe, inflamed by the intimate sharing of wondrous words gifted ….

Many would retreat from such deep and dangerous waters and find healing in the floating distractions of this world.

Carelessly… I plunged in their inviting darkness, diving deep within ….and re- membered ….

….I remembered an isolated beach, surrounded by my brothers and sisters, as the fires of Azrael raged between Land Sea and Sky, the Hymn to Her flowing through my body, heart and soul. My eyes could only See You my love, the deep vast blue of the sea engulfed in your eyes, you were yourself that night and I saw you as you truly were, Pure and Glorious. ..Yours I was forever …

….I remembered coming back to the same beach only a month ago, three years later, could it have been any another place? I was surrounded by all who had love within their heart, all gathered up to acknowledge your life and Walk with you a final time. As the river flows back to the sea, So does our soul flows back to her arms, As we are gathered home again by Her, the great void, the great Primordial bitter sea… Mother of the deep, Dancer of life and death.

A long tedious walk it has been my love, my sweet, before you reached eagerly her salty embrace.

3 deaths you had to undertake.

First the gateway of earth, your physical death, as I kissed your last breath, our bodies entangled in one last embrace, the intimacy between us reaching its pinnacle in that ultimate gift...

The gateway of fire, the purification, when the flames licked your soft wondrous flesh to reveal your glorious Self …

The gateway of air, when the ashes of your bones were release to the winds and your Spirit soared high above the landscape of stones …

And now we gathered at the gateway of water, the great Ma, to wave your soul back home ….

The circle of our earthy love was closed that night, River Walker, my sweet lord and lover, as the sweet waters from the rivers meandering through the forest of our love, gathered up with care by my own hands in a black alabaster jar, found their way back to the salted water of Death and Life ….a million jellyfish had stranded with loving sacrifice on that beach that night, a million eyes eager to witness your glorious arrival …and departure. we join our tears to our laughers , all mingled in the waves, walking deep in the tides to escort you to the most divine river of stars above , lighting up the way to your ascent …

Unto her

Higher

The great river

Higher

The great arc

Higher

The stars above

Higher

Past the rider and the pole

Higher

..To Her

…River run

Return to the waters you were born of

River walker

Lord of the fresh waters

My lover my husband

My dear heart

A way a lone a last a loved along the….*

*Inspired and some words taken from, Finnegans Wake, Book IV, James Joyce.

Video :River run, a play by Olwen Fouéré, shown at the Galway Arts festival, July 2013.